Why do certain people tip poorly at restaurants?

Question

I am in no way racist, so please do not leave me angry comments if you are black. This is simply an observance which I am trying to understand. I am a new server/bartender at a chain restaurant, and I am in college full time where I have friends of many races. I was warned by my fellow servers about black people being poor tippers and complaining and demanding. I experienced this myself on day 2 of work. The man treated me as if I were his personal b#@ch even though it was obvious I had a full bar and backed up drink orders from the servers. I ran around trying to get him and his wife all the crap they wanted, plus I was super nice to them. The guy said it was "obvious" that I was new there. They left me a dollar. Before you go yelling at me for hating blacks, I would like to point out that I had a young black guy order drinks and left a great tip...so I am trying to understand what is going on. I also notice some older people leave small tips, but maybe they don't have much money. Anyways, even my boss said not to run around too much for blacks. Now, I do live in kindof a ghetto- redneck area (Southern Baltimore) and I really hate the stereotypes around here, even if some of them are true. Anyways, I give good service regardless because I want to...but why bust my tail for "certain people" if they don't pay?

Answer 1

Regardless of race, some people just don't feel the need to tip as it's 'optional'.



I find it rude not to tip because I know that's where you're making most of your money. My brother was a waiter for many years. He had his fair share of people tipping poorly but he also had many that went over the top. Once, I think he got about $100 from a a guy and his wife. If I remember right, they were black, too.



It's not exactly fair to call the bunch of apples bad for seeing the rotten one on top.



Just be nice no matter what. I know you may suspect some people won't tip, but you never know that until they've left.



:)

Answer 2

I really don't want your $4 but I totally know where you are coming from. I think these people have never (obviously) worked as a tipped employee before. They don't realize that a huge percent of their server's income comes from their tips, and they also don't realize how aware their server is about the tip they leave. I had a large party one time, mostly adults in their mid to late 20's, they started to order their food, it so happened we were out of a few things they wanted, so I recommended some other things they would like. Of course, they enjoyed the things I suggested. Then they ordered desert and of course we were out of what they wanted again, so I suggested something else, which they liked. As a tip they left me their change from their $80 bill, and by change I mean coins. Yeah, not even a dollar. So I know how you feel. And to top it all off I worked in a state where they payed you way less (4/hr) than minimum wage because you were a tipped employee and they legally could. The thing about serving is, there will always be the tables that leave you ****, you may have a whole day with shitty tips, but it all will equal out in the long run and you should always be averaging a good amount. Sorry to be so long, i'm bored...

Answer 3

Frankly, WHY someone doesn't tip well is irrelevant. It may make an interesing sociology study, but assuming you are doing your job to the best of your ability, understanding the reasons why any given individual chooses not to tip well, while another does, won't change the amount of money you have at the end of the evening. Some people are jerks and some aren't. Some people are generous, some aren't. Some wish they could be, but can't. Some won't part with a dime, no matter how wealthy they are, unless it's pried from their cold, lifeless hands. Generally speaking, the more upscale the restaurant, the better the tips. But I have found it is more a case of the individual involved than one of race. Do your job as best you can, collect your tips graciously and gratefully, and get a better job as soon as your skills as a waitress warrant it. In a large city, in a good, busy restaurant, you can make a very good living that way...and meet some very interesting people, too.

Answer 4

Some people, of any race religion gender etc. and only some mind you, feel because they have been or feel they have been oppressed or shafted or feel they've otherwise been treated badly by society, that makes it ok for them to perpetrate the demeaning behavior on those who serve them. It's a very low class thing to do but some people haven't evolved socially enough to realize that. I suppose it's the only way they can feel they are getting their revenge for any personal insult they experienced in their lifetime whether real or imagined. The truly classy folks treat everyone as they would like to be treated no matter who you are, what you do, what "class" you are in. You already know this which is why you do your best to please everyone in your bar job even though the boss has condoned discrimination.



Some people are just cheap. I have friend who makes a bit more than I do, will inherit gobs of money, but she will never pick up the check if we're out as a group (even just her and me)--she's a close friend so I once asked her why and she just said I will NEVER see her picking up the check, she'll pay her fair share but she was brought up where paying for other people just isn't done. Once I understood that, I'm fine with it (and continue to sometimes treat her to meals or whatever just cause sometimes it's easier and fun). Other folks have never worked at a job where you have to give direct service (like a waiter or bar tender, face to face with the customer's satisfaction) to strangers so they have no idea what it entails; their whole world is so wrapped up in themselves they cannot see that you have a whole room full of people you are tending to (and doing it really well). Older people do pinch pennies, sometimes on the strangest things. Many older citizens are on a fixed income or have only a very limited expendible income so things like tips take the hit. Just do your best at any job you take on and don't pass on this stingy behavior when you are on the other side of the buck.

Answer 5

to answer your question barbara, it hasn't got anything to do with race, some people are just nasty and want what they want and dont realize that waitresses DONT make minimum wage, not even close, and that tipping is about 75% of our income. in response to



Barbara, seriously. You are a waitress at a restaurant. You are expecting more than minimum wage for that job?! I someone does not tip you, oh well. You chose this field to employment. Somehow, you feel obligated to extra compensation...well, go to school and better yourself. Sorry, but that is blunt but reality girl.



you can feel free to dive of the nearest cliff. with the economy the way it is, you should know that finding a job is the hardest right now, so often the "low end" jobs are all that are available. try not being so assumptuous, and a little more observant, barbara SAID SHE WAS IN COLLEGE! she's waitressing, not shoprite bagging. go to hell.



barbara, your best bet is to just grin and bear it, and remember that no matter who is an *** and who isn't, you've got a job, and as long as you keep up that college education, you'll be out of the restaurant chain, and into something lucrative. good luck hun!

Answer 6

I DON'T think you sound racist. I've heard the exact same complaint from servers in lots of different places. It's kind of an ugly secret that no one talks about outside the business -- because they don't want to sound racist!



I'm from the South, though, and I can tell you that even in poor neighborhoods there you'll find people -- black or white -- generally give decent tips for good service. I think it's because we're raised to appreciate etiquette and hard work. (I promise, I'm a twenty-percenter, more if the service is outstanding -- though I've left face-down pennies before for a couple of really atrocious waitresses.)



Your best bet is probably to just do your best and smile at any tip -- and make sure the other servers don't stick you with all the "bad" tables.

Answer 7

Some people are bad tippers because they are just ignorant of what is the right thing to do, some are just very cheap, some are just greedy and selfish jerks.



My husband and I had to teach our in-laws that they were undertipping all the time. We would add to the tip ourselves (and let them see it), or we'd say that the person deserved more. They eventually learned, because they are good people. They just didn't know.



You shouldn't pre-judge someone's potential tipping just because of their race, color, or age. Maybe they sense your negative attitude and tip accordingly. Besides, you said yourself that one black guy tipped really well.



It's always annoying to me when I hear that men are better tippers than women. I'm a woman and a really good tipper. I always want to give even more than my husband does, and he's a good tipper, too.



I believe in tipping well because I know that I wouldn't want to be doing that difficult job. I also treat servers with respect, and ask for what I want in a nice way (even when I'm being fussy).



You should just do your job the best you can, and treat everyone as if they are a good person (unless they show you otherwise). Try not to fall into that racist or ageist judgment of people.

Answer 8

Wow, regardless of how UNracist you're trying to sound, you sound quite the opposite. Especially when you say things like "certain people". I think it sucks that anyone would tip a server badly, especially when he or she is providing the best service they can. IMO anyone that can't afford tip their server well shouldn't be going out to eat in the first place. I usually tip 20%, plus $1 a drink if we order drinks from the bar (and if you're especially pleasent and attentive, I'll tip even more). I'll still tip the same if the server is new, is obviously making an effort, and has a good attitude. I'm irked by servers whom I know could care less about my table because of their preconceived notions of who is a good tipper and who is not. Maybe that's why "certain people" tip the way they do. I myself have been tempted to do this but don't because I don't want to justify their assumptions.

Answer 9

My sister is a server and she ALWAYS complains about black people being bad tippers. She says there is even a black waiter who can admit that his black tables dont tip well AT ALL. I alwyas used to call my sister racist. It could be just a trend that servers see.



Its not racist, its just a difference of culture.

Answer 10

Here's another thought...

Why is it that when white people are critical of a black person's behavior, they are considered racist, but if you were black and were making the same complaint about a white customer, then everyone would say that the customer was racist!?



Having said that, you must realize that ******* come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. If it happens that the majority of the ******* in your area are black, then you're not necessarily being racist, just observant. Unfortunately, when you say something about a member of a race that you do not belong to , people make the assumption that you think it applies to every single member of that race.



It is possible that this man was indeed a racist himself and in his own sick, twisted way thought he was getting his own form of "reparations" by making you work your butt off to suit his desires. It is also possible that you were looking for that behavior from him because a few people told you some things to make you sensitive to it. Either way, his behavior is inexcusable, but because you are not a member of his race, you are expected to walk on eggshells when you complain about it. Just be smart when you vent!

Answer 11

You are right. So is Poyzin. I think they find it amusing to watch us run our asses off & tip a buck. Seriously, get yourself into a nicer place. I work at a fine dining steakhouse (owned by a brother & sister). I wait on a LOT of old people. There are only a couple that are stuck in ten percent.

Answer 12

Come on. I'm not supposed to think you're racist when you say he treated you like his personal *****? There are ways to say that without resorting to derogatory profanity.



You work hard because you never know how people will tip. If they don't tip well, there can be many reasons. Ignorance of how you are paid, a lack of money, family values that say give $1 no matter what (my dad did this...embarrassing). Take every person on there own merits.

Answer 13

i know they think people owe them something..im demanding but give me good serivce and i will tip good but give me bad service and i will not tip good if at all

Answer 14

So what's your point? You say that black people are cheap, yet there was one who gave a good tip. You're contradicting yourself.

Answer 15

Barbara, seriously. You are a waitress at a restaurant. You are expecting more than minimum wage for that job?! I someone does not tip you, oh well. You chose this field to employment. Somehow, you feel obligated to extra compensation...well, go to school and better yourself. Sorry, but that is blunt but reality girl.

Answer 16

that's the job you picked; just quit.why doesn't the restaurant require a 10% tip? that would eliminate the problem.

Answer 17

Tipping isnt compulsory...

We have a choice ..

and I`m afraid you do sound racists..