Is a private email an internet forum?

Question

When leaving a church, I asked the pastors and church leaders in an email not to disclose the reasons why I left. However, someone leaked this email to someone else, and she was hurt by it. When I asked the recipients who betrayed my confidence, the senior "pastor" stated that it nothing on the internet is private and is therefore gossip.

Who could a private email be remotely considered non-private and gossip?

Answer 1

This pastor is not much of a pastor/leader of standup kind of man. He got hurt by your decision, he chose to leak this out to others, and now that he was confronted, instead of telling the truth, that he lied, he broke confidnece, he leaked that out to everyone. I mean he did everything wrong.



Nope, don't let this guy making your feel like you did the wrong thing. he was the gossiper.

Answer 2

People have different perspectives on privacy and gossip, and sometimes the lines become blurred depending on the situation. You specifically requested your decision to leave the church be kept confidential and this was violated so it is understandable you feel a sense of disrespect. Yes, once an email or image or any commentary is in cyberspace, it can never be returned but that said, it would be have been courteous if the pastor had kept your email confidential. Perhaps he was frustrated, angry or saddened by your departure and felt your reasoning had to be shared?

Answer 3

Once you send an e-mail, there is no way to trace who got it (whether or not you expect it to be confidential).



There are times when more than one person has access to an e-mail account, especially in a church. There is no "chain of command," as in written correspondence and, even if it was with paper and pen, there is not way to ENSURE something remains confidential.



Even when you send correspondence marked PERSONAL & CONFIDENTIAL .. that is a "request." Once someone receives it, there is no way to avoid them passing it to someone else.



Once you put anything in e-mail or on the Internet (including papers and pictures), you can't control where it goes. Also, anyone can post this question from this forum and post it somewhere else.

Answer 4

It may be *your* private email, but you have no way of knowing on the recipient's and what happens or who sees it. Yes, it's a betrayal of trust - and as a stretch it could be seen as gossip talking about something negative with no means or intention of solving an apparent problem).



Funny, their comment about gossip, given that they were the ones who chose to disclose what had been said. Distasteful really, and a statement of character.

Answer 5

Anytime you send an email you have to assume that others will see it. I have found this out the hard way too. Multiple people may have access to your pastors account, especially if it is the main email for the church. He very well might have an assistant that screens everything for him. And then if he forwards the email, who can say who that person will forward the email to. You have to be very vigilant.



I am sorry you had to find this out the hard way.

Answer 6

Quite simply, he betrayed your trust. No, e-mail is not a public forum, ask the many companies who send confidential messages to each other and the ones who get fired for leaking them to anyone who isn't authorized to see them. I doubt he'd be singing the same tune had it happened to him, though.

Answer 7

Holy sh*t. Sounds like that pastor is pretty evil.

Answer 8

i think he's not to be trusted and just as well you left!