Who's right me or my mom?

Question

I am 16 and think i'm old enough to know my own style when it comes to clothes that i wear, but my mom says i dont kno my own style yet and its not the "norm" for teen girls to wear to wear t shirts, they're supposed to b wearing skirts,blouses,and dresses. i c PLENTY of girls my age wearing t shirts.It's not like i only wear t shirts either. i think that ppl were put on this earth each with their own style and personality. am i wrong?

Answer 1

make it fun go together and ask her to look at the look u would like to have also point out to her some other people wearing this style yes at 16 u should have some input but dont get carried away and have u given her a reason to doubt your taste!!!talk to your mom she should be cool with it

Answer 2

You're right. Your mom seems to be being a bit overbearing and over protective. Sixteen is way old enough to choose your own clothes. As long as you're not dressing like a little hoochie. Maybe she has a problem with the t-shirts being too tight or something? Teens do wear them snug these days. But those tight t-shirts are just a throwback, recycled from the 70's when the women wore those tiny tees and you could get glitter letters ironed on...I had a few myself, even into the early 80's. Your mom just may be afraid that guys will be noticing your curves in certain clothes...It's gonna happen, she can't stop it, but as a parent it seems she's just trying to slow down the process of guys noticing her little girl. She may feel that the more conservative, or lady-like or "little girly" you dress, the less negative attention you will get from males and adults...Plus, she may be really concerned that the way you dress is a reflection of her parenting skills and taste...She may be worried about what other parents will think, maybe the church folks or something. But, I do think she should let you have some say in how you want to dress, maybe you two could compromise and meet half-way on some of the styles? Good Luck!

Answer 3

Why can't you both sit down and discuss the matter and come to some agreement?



You are 16 now, and she should be allowing you SOME responsibility for your own clothing style. It's part of your growing up.



She may still be seeing you as her "darling 9 year old" who needs to be told how to dress and which shoes go with which dress.



Try to explain to her that you really wish to have some more control over your "style" but that you realize she has "concerns" over what is "decent" these days. Ask if she can give you some lee-way, and you will listen and follow her suggestions, too. Try to work together!! Have you shopped together? It would be a great learning and bonding experience. Maybe when she SEES that you are SHOWING that you are RESPONSIBLE, she will let up on her controls even more.



Good luck!





Have a polite day.

Answer 4

As far as style goes, I believe you are right. Everyone has their own style and you know what yours is - looking like every other girl in school. Which is fine.



HOWEVER...



You do live under your mother's roof. You have your room and board provided for you and probably a little more. You obviously have a mother who cares about the impression her daughter has on others - perhaps because she has such high hopes for her daughter.



SO



Try to come up with a compromise. Take some of the suggestions here and talk to her in a very calm, non-emotional way. Perhaps a compromise might entail you getting to wear your "cool" clothes to school (or evenings or whenever) with the agreement that if she thinks it's too over the edge you will consider another "cool" outfit. However, you will wear her style of clothes at a time when you can both agree to them.



IN ADDITION...



Don't expect your mother to buy these clothes you want. You are old enough to have a job and you know how she feels about it. Buy your own but don't go too far over the edge.



ALSO



You will be 18 soon and will probably be off at college. You will be able to choose your clothing then.



Good Luck

Answer 5

I believe that at 16 you should be able to choose your own style as long as it doesn't break any rules at school. Maybe you could save the skirts, blouses and dresses for when you visit your grandparents or if there is a really special family outing that requires more than jeans and a tee shirt. Show your mother the answers your getting here. Maybe she'll lighten up

Answer 6

Everyone gives away, with almost everything they do, how well brought up they are - it is almost impossible not to write the quality of your upbringing in huge neon letters with everything you do. Very few people could identfy exactly what it looks like, but everyone recognises it.



I understand how peers with wide parental license look like a much better model of behaviour from where you sit. Many girls at 16 have been brought up by parents who don't actually mind what their daughters look like, or how they are percieved.



Are they trash?



Your parents may suspect that they are. It doesn't matter what they think. What do you think. Do you want to be thought of as being like them?



It sounds like your parents have put some thought and energy into your upbringing. Until you develop sound judgement (until you make the sort of decisions they would make), they will exercise what they see as sound judgement on your bahalf.



Tee-shirts are fine. Are you sure you are talkiing about normal Tee-shirts? Is anything written on them? Do these tee-shirts have messages? Do they suggest sexual availability /promiscuity? Do your tops reveal flesh around your midrift? If so, your parents think these all suggest poor judgement.



Jeans are fine. Jeans revealing where your cheeks part company, frames with a thong (fashionable jeans) also suggest poor judgement.



You sound like a smart, intelligent, woman with a strong positive self-esteem, and not desperate for any attention from anyone.



Until you can dress like it, rather than a fashion victim wannabe, aping the next generation of single Mums you envy for their sartorial freedom, your parents will dress you like you were Amish Barbie.



I wanted to offer you my insight into your parents point of view and motives; I am truly sorry to relate things you may not want to hear.

Answer 7

Surprisingly, both you and your mom are right.

Your age is the big factor. At 16, you are are in the middle of stopping being mommy's girl and becoming your own person. Your mother doesn't like it; no parent likes this stage and at the same time, you are brash enough in your rush to adulthood to being "full speed ahead and damn the torpedoes!"

What you are going through is so very normal for the age group and gender so stay the course and keep plodding forward. As time goes on, you will get more choices and in the meantime, your mom acts like a brake on a car speeding downhill. Her resistance stops you from rushing headlong into a ditch.

Be of good cheer, you are going through a very normal stage and, in the end, you get to be your own person with a mom who is also a friend.

I have raised two boys and a girl and have been there, done that. We all survived and I see them as adults with their own way to have to go.

Answer 8

Your mom is wrong. Most teen girls do like t-shirts.

My 14 year old daughter doesn't even own a dress. She usually wears t-shirts and jeans.

You should be picking your own style.

Answer 9

I'm probably older than your mom, and I'd have to say she's WAY wrong on this one. Who the heck wears dresses every day these days? This ain't the Donna Reed show anymore!



It may be that your mom wishes you'd pay a little more attention to your appearance. Since you are her daugter, you ARE a reflection on her. So if you look slouchy and disheveled it makes her look bad. I bet you could get her to ease up on you if you met her half-way on this, and simply made a little effort to not look "slouchy."



And at 16 you are TOTALLY on the way to deciding your own style and personality. Would she rather you be some sheep, following the masses without any thought? Very soon you will be out on your own and the time to prepare for that day is NOW.



Go easy on your mom... she knows she will only have you as her "baby" for a short time longer and that's painful on a mom.

Answer 10

When I was a teenager, all I wore was t-shirts. I basically never wore a skirt, blouse or dress EVER.



I think when it comes to clothes, it's up to you to express yourself. Maybe it won't be your style a few years down the line, but fashion changes. That's kind of the point.

Answer 11

Mom is always right.



If she allowed you to ware what ever you wanted then you'd know she didn't care. This shows that she cares for you and loves you without the "latest trends". This speak volumes, because its too bad youth doesn't see that what you wear does not make the person any better then the next. Its all about character. But, always communicate and be honest and maybe she'll be more flexible with your choice of clothes. I think after all she does or probably pays for them. Having it go in your favor, get a job part time and pay for them yourself. Just an hint. But, even still she may not allow you to ware it. Depending on what it is and what the t-shirt has on it. Be careful picking out obscene or riskay expressions and pick something that you know is trendy but also MOM approved. Good Luck and Thank your mom for caring.

There are some parents who don't care what the child wears and most likely pays for it knowingly. So sad.

Answer 12

You have every right to dress with your own personal style, however, your mom might have certain rules that you should abide by, for instance if she doesn't want you wearing mini-skirts and tank tops, she has every right to tell you not to wear certain outfits. But what colors you want to wear, what brands you want to wear, when you want to wear certain outfits is 100% your choice.

Answer 13

Style is definitely personal. If you want to wear T shirts, go ahead.

Answer 14

ur right. i dont own a skirt or a blouse. cute t's are whayt im about.



but its ok to have a little bit of variation. b/c thats when people come up to u in the hall and are like, wow, you look great today!



just find the happy medium

Answer 15

You're more than capable of deciding what you want to wear. If your mother is anything like mine she'll *want* you in "nice" dresses & skirts (a.k.a the kind that make you like your 5 again).



That doesn't mean you have to wear them though; I didn't! Now my mother *hates* me wearing skirts & dresses though, so you can't really win!

Answer 16

I agree with you. However, you need to be polite to your Mom when talking about this issue.



Does your Mom have friends with daughters your age? Do your friends come to your house? Can you get your Mom to come and meet your friends and peers and see what they wear?



Suggest to your Mom that you own both types of clothes. Wear her type when doing activities with her, and your type when going to school ect. Choose conservative tee shirts (without nasty slogans, not too low cut, not too sheer, ect)

Answer 17

Your mom sounds old-school. It sounds like she wants you to dress in a very lady-like fashion. A t-shirt is appropriate for a girl your age, so you are right. Now if you wanted to run around in a bikini top, that would be a different story.

Answer 18

I think you're right. T-shirts should be worn. They are like just regular clothing to wear.

Answer 19

I really don't think this is about clothes it is about respect for your Mom's opinions. Remember she loves you more then anyone can or will in this life time. So she is smothering you a little bit get over it there a thousands of kids that would love to have a Mom in their life even if she does smother you a little bit. She means well don't be to hard on her.

Answer 20

You are sooo not wrong. I believe in being able to wear whatever the hell you want. You are your own person, sure your mother may have given birth to you... BUT YOU ARE STILL YOUR OWN PERSON, WHO CAN PICK WHAT THEY WANT TO WEAR. I think that you need to tell your mom that you are old enough to make these choices on your own. Tell her that its just clothes, nothing serious. Hunniiii wear whatever you want. Who cares what ANYBODY thinks....!

Answer 21

Danggg, no offence but you are right.

I'm 17 and I wear whatever I want to (As long as it's not whorey ofcourse). T-shirts, tanktops, whatever the heck you want to wear is FINE. :)

Answer 22

Assuming you're dressing in a decent manner, you're right - and I'm a mom.

Answer 23

She is your mom..but i see your point!. I don't see many young folks wearing skirts.dresses. Its mostly jeans..stuff..

But hey, we're in the country.

Answer 24

i think you are right. its not like you are asking to pierce your belly button or anything. tell your mom you are sixteen and need a little freedom. tell her that you respect her views, but you need express yourself in different waysg. tell her that you are still going to go within some of her boundries and respect your morals, but with your own sense of creativity.

Answer 25

well i think your mom is wrong because you are 16 i think you are responsible enough to know what u can wear and what not...

Answer 26

Moms are always right. You only have 2 years left until you're an adult. Listen to your mom, make your life easier.

Answer 27

As long as your dont look like you could work the streets, I think you are right.

Answer 28

as long as you dont look like you work on the corner should be able to choose

Answer 29

You, your mom can have a totally different taste then you.

Answer 30

Your Mom is the boss.

Answer 31

Wow, tell your mom to lighten up and realize that the women's liberation movement was in the 20th century. You should be able to wear whatever you feel comfortable in.

Answer 32

just look your best no not wrong

Answer 33

you

Answer 34

Your money? Your right. Her money? She is right.

:)

Answer 35

you are not wrong your mom is .

you should be able to wear wat you want

Answer 36

You're right. Your mom is on crack. BLOUSES wtf? No offence hun but you are right.